group of middle aged people sitting at a cozy coffee shop enjoying each other with smiles and coffees on the table

Savvy Talks: We're Living Longer. So Why Are So Many of Us Feeling Lonelier?

 
Originally aired on 6/26/2026 for WGN Radio 720.

We're getting really good at living longer.

The challenge now is making sure those extra years are filled with people, purpose, laughter, and connection.

Loneliness has quietly become one of the biggest health challenges of our time. It's linked to depression, anxiety, heart disease, high blood pressure, and even a shorter lifespan. The good news? It isn't inevitable.

Connection doesn't usually happen by accident. It's something we build—one conversation, one invitation, one small habit at a time.

Here are 10 simple ways to feel less lonely and more connected.

1. Stop Waiting for Someone Else to Reach Out

Most lonely people are waiting for someone else to make the first move. Be the one who sends the text. Make the phone call. Invite someone for coffee. Someone has to go first. It might as well be you.

2. Put One Recurring Date on Your Calendar

Friendships don't survive on good intentions. They survive on routine. Schedule a monthly lunch. A weekly walk. Sunday breakfast. A standing happy hour. When it's already on the calendar, you don't have to wonder when you'll see each other again.

3. Make Friends Outside Your Age Group

Some of the best conversations happen between people who grew up in completely different worlds. Spend time with younger people. Older people. Neighbors. Coworkers. Volunteers. Different generations have different perspectives—and that's exactly what makes those friendships so rewarding.

4. Become Useful

One of the fastest ways to feel connected is to help someone else. Volunteer at an animal shelter. Read to children. Serve at a food pantry. Help at your library or hospital. Purpose has a funny way of introducing you to people.

5. Turn Acquaintances Into Friends

Think about the people you already see every week. The person at yoga. The neighbor walking their dog. The cashier who always remembers your name. Friendships often begin with lots of small conversations—not one big one.

6. Take a Class Where People Actually Talk

Skip another online course. Take something in person. Cooking. Painting. Photography. Dance. Pickleball. Shared experiences create conversations without feeling awkward.

7. Trade Some Screen Time for Face Time

You can spend an hour scrolling and still feel alone. A 20-minute conversation with a real person often does more for your mood than a hundred likes ever will.

8. Become a Regular Somewhere

The same coffee shop. The same farmers market. The same walking trail. The same neighborhood café. People begin recognizing you. You begin recognizing them.Those little moments of familiarity matter more than we realize.

9. Go Beyond Small Talk

Instead of asking, "How are you?" Ask: "What's been the best part of your week?" "What are you excited about right now?" Then answer honestly yourself. Real friendships usually begin when someone is willing to be a little vulnerable first.

10. Follow the "Say Yes" Rule

Here's my favorite. If someone invites you somewhere and you don't have a really good reason to say no... Say yes. Loneliness often grows because we keep choosing comfort over connection. Some of the best friendships—and best memories—begin with plans you almost skipped.

🎯 My favorite takeaway

Treat your social life the way you treat your physical fitness. Nobody expects to get strong without exercising. Yet many people expect friendships to somehow maintain themselves.

Relationships need workouts too. And the good news? You can start building social fitness at any age—even at 70, 80, or beyond. A new friendship today could still be part of your life 20 or 30 years from now.

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